September.....

September used to be my favourite time of year. It used to represent a time of change in a good way, a fresh start. On September 16th it will be Emersyn’s 1st birthday. Instead of picking out a special cake and inviting all of her little friends over to celebrate we will be wishing that we could just hold her again for five minutes. We will decide if we should go to McMaster Children’s Hospital to help out for the day or if we should have a picnic at the cemetery, sometimes we think we should just stay in bed and pull the covers over our heads. Every change of season will bring a new and different kind of “what if” and what could have been. This time last year I was two weeks and two days away from giving birth to our first child and I was full of anticipation and excitement! I felt so connected to the little person that I was carrying and I could not wait to meet her. Emersyn was born on a beautiful sunny day in September.